CRACK!THEORY
Robin Scherbatsky + Marshall Eriksen = ~lovechild Cory MonteithRobin is an awesome, independent Canadian woman from Vancouver, BC. Her father raised her as a boy for much of her childhood and though she resented that upbringing, she still enjoys cigars, hockey, scotch and guns. In the 90s, she was a Canadian teen pop star under the name, Robin Sparkles, and did several mall tours. She had two ‘big’ hits; ‘Let’s Go To The Mall’ and ‘Sandcastles in the Sand’. Her dream is to be a respected news reporter/anchor and has held a couple positions as reporter/co-host on Metro News 1 and ‘Come On Get Up New York’. She’s known for her ability to wingwoman like a pro, play a mean game of laser tag and be able to do girly things with her best friend Lily Aldrin as well as hang with the boys.
Marshall is an adorable, tall, goofy guy from St. Cloud, Minnesota. He grew up with older brothers who would gang up on him since he was the ‘shortest’, even though he is 6-foot-4. His dream was to become an environmental lawyer, but currently works for Goliath National Bank on their legal team. He is good at games and plays the piano quite well. Marshall often sings songs he’s made up including hits like, ‘You Just Got Slapped’ and his studying law song that had unforgettable lyrics: “Studying law / Making a responsible choice for my future / On a Friday night… / Being a lawyer had better be awesome”. He loves all kinds of food and spent years searching for the best burger in New York City.
Marshall and Robin finally bond in the fourth season episode Little Minnesota as both are from frigid areas and enjoy the same things while in a Minnesota-themed bar. They both love full-contact sports, Fisherman’s Quest and a nice cold beer. In the future, they mistakenly sleep together after a crazy night involving drunken BaskIceBall and stripper Monopoly and Robin becomes pregnant. Nine months later she goes back to Canada and Cory is born.
Cory is a tall, awkward but awesome Canadian and has a heart of gold. He’s got brown eyes and freckles like Marshall, and is a dark brunette like Robin. He grows up as a musical child; banging on drums, strumming on guitars, and making up songs about food. His most notable ‘Chicken Song’ has the following lyrics: “I don’t want fish / I want chicken / when will there be chicken?”. Cory’s love for chicken is only rivaled by his love for electronic gadgets. He goes through a phase where his flipcam is his best friend, and he constantly films his friends, but soon moves onto an iPhone, which never leaves his sight. Along with his dorky yet charming personality, he is also well read and quite thoughtful. Cory is a perfect mixture of his two parents who are very proud of him for landing a roll on the hit TV show, Glee.
(via herdandelion)
